CST Steam

It really bothers me that the california state tests aren't an effective measure of a child's ability.  I have spent the last six months simply trying to survive teaching the eighth grade, but today is CST day.  And I'm nervous.  Really, really nervous.  As a first year teacher, I shouldn't be as nervous as I am.  I'm not perfect, and I'm not highly effective.  But these students of mine are potentially going to receive the lowest marks they've ever received on this test, and its a reflection on me.  Even though that's not what California says is the point of this series of ridiculous tests.  Its frustrating that I'm unutterably expected to teach to the test, but I'm utterably not.  

A colleague pointed out a poignant thought however, when I divulged my concerns over a cup of impromptu coffee the other day:  Perhaps this test really is the mark of a good teacher, who doesn't teach to the test.  Perhaps it separates those who lean on the crutch of the standardized curriculum, and those who are capable of instilling the same knowledge without being told what to do each day in class, verminitum.  (My feeble attempt at making up latin words: minute by minute).   Did my credentialling program prepare me to be the former or the latter of those groups of teachers?  

I guess I'll find out around the same time that I find out whether or not I am employed next year.  A week before school starts.

Cie la freaking Vie.